A Day in the Life of Me

Yes this post isn't about food, but I feel that I need to explain what my life is like each day. For those who may not know me I am 30 years old (soon to be 31) and am a SAHM of 3 girls Kiara, who is 7 Serenity who will be 5 in June, and Faelyn who is 6 months. We also have a 6 month old puppy, Sassafras. We got the puppy becasue the girls have been begging for a dog for years and Ben really wanted a companion. She really is his buddy, though Faelyn might end up stealing her away when she grows up. Nothing makes that baby laugh like the dog! Ben does all her baths and walks her a fair amount of time but since he is so forgetful that job usually falls to me. Here is my usual schedule Monday-Thursday
6:45 first alarm I nurse the baby
7:15 I get out of bed get dressed and dress Faelyn make sure the girls are dressed
7:40 Get Kiara her medicine and have her pick out a granola bar or somethign for breakfast
8:00 Load the girls in the truck Take Serenity to school
8:45 Drop Kiara off and head home
9:00 Take Sassafras out for a walk
9:10 Feed Sassafras Make Faelyn a bottle
9:30 get Mommy breakfast check facebook
10:00 Get Ben up for work and play with Faelyn
10:30 fight off an anxiety attack
10:50 Wake Ben up again Nurse Faelyn
11:15 Lock dog in crate put Faelyn in carseat
11:20 leave to take Ben to work
11:30 head to Sebring toget Serenity from school
12:10pm Get home from getting Serenity
12:20 Make Faelyn a bottle
12:40 Take Sassafras out for a walk
1:00pm Make lunch for me feed Faelyn cereal
1:45 work on dishes
2:30 clean living room/play with Serenity & Faelyn & nurse Faelyn
3:15 Load girls in the truck to get Kiaira from school
3:40 Back home get Kiara & Serenity a snack
4:00pm Workout
4:30 Spend some time on the computer while the girls watch TV or play on the computer and Faelyn naps
5:00pm Nurse Faelyn
5:20 Do work around the house (varies day to day)
6:00pm Nurse Faelyn help Kiara with her homework and prep dinner
6:45 pack the girls in the truck to go get Ben from work
7:30 Get home make dinner, eat dinner, feed Faelyn
8:30 Tuck the girls in bed, make Faelyn a bottle & nurse, lay out their clothes for school
9:30 put Faelyn to bed
10:00pm Unwind by watching TV or reading or computer
10:45 spend a few minutes with Ben
11:30 Head to bed.
3:30am Wake up when Ben comes to bed talk with him a few minutes and nurse Faelyn

The only thing that changes in this schedule is if Ben isn't working 11-7 he works usually either 7am-4pmor 6pm-close. When he closes he drives himself. There is also at least once a week that I have to go to the store for groceries. Plus once a month I go to a food pantry on a Thursday evening. Sometimes Ben will tuck the girls in and he usually takes her out for her evening walk.
My household chores consist of:
washing & drying dishes
sweeping
dusting
picking up trash & toys and clothes
deciding on dinner
making dinner & lunch
general cleaning
folding and puttign away laundry
gathering trash
feeding the animals
Then of course taking care of the kids and any other projects around the house we come up with.
Is it bad, no not really. I am always super busy I write for 2 different websites and am a guide for ChaCha though I don't get to work very often. Wht makes it hard is my anxiety. I am constantly worried about what we are goign to do with the van what are we going to do if the truck brakes too, what if the kids get sick, what if Ben or I get really sick or hurt, how are we going to keep surviving on what Ben makes, how can I make more money, what if one of the pets die, what if the fish tank over flows, what if the hosue catches fire, what if, what if, what if! THAT is what makes my life hard the constant worry that doesn't go away. I have small panic attacks EVERY TIME I get in the truck or even the van when it was working. Why? Becasue I am afraid of being abandoned and stranded. I have a game plan I have a list of people I can call to come get me and the kids, but it doesn't stop my anxiety. I try different ways to deal with it. I challenge it to come on full force, I ignore it by engaging myself in a game, book or Tv show, I try to smoother it by cuddling with Ben or the baby or even having sex. I am limited on what I can take bcause of breastfeeding. I just called the doctor because it is getting to be more than I can handle again. The St. John's Wort I am taking does help, but I need more. I need for Ben to get a better paying job and to figure ut what is going on with the van so we know what to do with it. Whether we are going to fix it or junk it. I hope those of you who read this will get a glimpse into my life and understand what I go through and how each day is very taxing to me emotionally and becasue so physically.

So it's been awhile!

Yes it has been just over 6 months since I last made a post. The day after my last post I gave birth to my 3rd daughter Faelyn Rae she was born a little after 4pm on Monday September 13th, 2010 weighing in at 9lbs 8.3 ozs! Her delivery was a whirlwind. I delivered her at the Salem Hospital instead of Alliance becasue by the time I got to SCH 5 mintues from my hosue I was already 10 cm!

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Faelyn Rae Zurbrugg 6 months old

After I had her we went without our van from October 30th when it overheated on us until December 28th. When we finally got it back from the shop. Now we are without it again as it died on me last Friday when I was on my way to the store. We are still tryign to decide what we are going to do with it. I did apply for a merchandising job 2 weeks ago. It would have been great I would have only worked about 10 hours a week. Sadly I didn't get it. I am writing for the Examiner.com and Suite101.com so please look me up and read my articles. I will still be posting on here. I hope to someday get paid for blogging like this rather than just writing articles.